An ex trying to make up or get back together can place a lot of pressure and uncertainty to most of us. This is because no matter how recent or long the breakup was, there are still remaining emotions that can wreak havoc inside of all of us. The essential question is: what do you do?

Assessment of the past

First thing to consider is, were you really happy with the relationship? Is it really worth getting back to? The challenging thing about answering these questions is that it’s hard to do with objectivity. As mentioned, the emotions involved with the past relationship will surge back up. To get some form of objectivity, you can consult close friends for some advice and get some level-headed assessment of how your relationship was.

Abusive relationship

If your past relationships involved some form of abuse, then there’s nothing to think about. You just need to decline the offer and you should move on with your life. Abuse in a relationship doesn’t really just involve physical abuse, it also includes emotional abuse. If your ex had the habit of putting you down, limiting your actions and making you feel guilty and depressed, then you were being abused in that relationship. Save yourself from the hurt and be thankful that you were free from that relationship. You don’t need to go back to that kind of life.

What if you want to get back as well?

If you still have feelings for your ex and it was not an abusive relationship, then getting back together is possible. But you don’t need to rush in. Since you’re also dealing with hurt feelings, you need to take things slow and get to know each other again.

What if you don’t want to?

You need to say no politely and firmly. Try to express your resolution positively without getting emotional. Though it would be hard to do, this is needed to give some form of closure in your relationship. By being quite formal and resolute in your expression, you can more effectively communicate your decision.

Dealing with your ex can be a roller coaster ride of emotions, but you need to stay rational and know whether you really want to get back together with your ex. But ultimately, no matter what your ex says or do, the decision to get back together will depend on you.

Photo Credit :  scarleth white

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